King's Knight
Jared is playing King's Knight. Synopsis Jared thinks the cover looks pretty cool. This must be some kind of overlooked RPG right? No! It's a shooter with fake RPG elements. This game was made by Square before Final Fantasy, and the story is that the princess gets kidnapped, and the King's Knight must save her (at least it isn't four objects representing the elements!). Ray Jack moves very slowly and destroys the land he is trying to save. Enemies come from everywhere - hanging around the walls, on top of the walls, even from the walls! The game is so hard that Jared's first few runs of this game all ended in quick deaths. Damage just piles on. A death isn't game over - players simply move on to the next character. The wizard's stage is awful to look at. The blinding white background is made worse by white enemies that shoot white projectiles. The next stage is an adorable lizard. Who could possibly call him a monster? And - he is dead. Finally is Kid Theif Toby. Jared HATES Toby, who has to deforest a beach. Most of the stage is in water, and the water feels like moving like ice. Jared can only get to the final level as the wizard. He keeps on dying though. He gets trapped in, and asks how this game is fair. Jared thought his level was too low, and thought that killing enemies would improve his chances. He was wrong, it's actually done by picking up power-ups. But the arrows don't make any sense. Up gives health, and down takes away health. Every power-up doesn't make sense. Jared thought the boots would give him speed, but they don't do anything. "They're not speed boots, they're just Normal Boots!" They do speed the player up, but it takes a while. Also, never get the Poke Ball! Every living player makes it to the final stage. Players need to use the arrows to choose party members (one to the left, one to the right, or LOL completely random!). Jared gets everyone to the final level - except for Toby. Jared soon learns that he has to have everybody - even Toby. Jared needs to get every character's spells, and one of the requirements of each level is to go to an underground section - which are much harder than the overworld levels. This ruins any fun this game could have been. With such a large hitbox, playing as everyone makes the game even harder. This all causes more death. Jared gives up and puts in his Game Genie just so he can beat the game. Not even that could keep him alive! Jared is shocked that the Game Genie failed him. Jared can't stress how stupid the character selecting works - the game is in control rather than the player. Finally, he makes it to the final boss with the dragon's - body. His head suddenly appears, and Jared describes how the stupid battle works. The dragon is soon killed with a sword through the dragon's head and out his butt, and everybody celebrates. The princess runs up excitedly to Ray Jack, but looks disappointed. There aren't any credits in this game. It's stupid and short. Rather than making clever level design and monsters to make a game harder and expand the game's life, this game uses counter-intuitive choices to work against the player. Everything has to be done perfectly, with no room for error. Toby sucks and Jared hates him. Square was going bankrupt, so they made Final Fantasy as their final effort to stay alive, and they were going bankrupt because they were making crap like this. Jared throws the cartridge, and it hits him on his knee. Category:ProReview Category:Videos